The decision maker who was never in the room with you

4 days ago
3 min read

Updated: 2 days ago

Introduction

Weeks of conversation with an engaged, positive contact, and then the answer comes back that they have decided not to proceed. Somewhere in the background a partner, a director, a spouse or a committee reviewed it and said no, on the basis of a summary you never saw, presented by somebody who was not equipped to argue for it.

This is one of the most common ways deals are lost and one of the least examined, because the loss is attributed to price or timing rather than to a conversation the supplier was absent from. The remedy is mostly about finding out early that the person exists and then making sure your case reaches them intact.

1. The decision maker who was never in the room should be identified early

The first move.

Ask in the first or second conversation who else will be involved in the decision. It is a normal question, buyers answer it readily, and the answer changes what you produce. Asking late, once a proposal is out, sounds like a challenge to your contact's authority.

2. Ask what they will care about

The second question.

A finance person, a technical colleague and a spouse weigh different things. Knowing which concerns to address is what makes the material you provide useful rather than generic. Your contact usually knows exactly what will be asked and will tell you if invited to.

3. Accept that you will usually not meet them

The realistic position.

Requesting a meeting with the absent approver is occasionally welcome and frequently awkward for your contact. Offering is fine; insisting undermines the person carrying your case. Offer it once, lightly, and let them decide.

4. Write for the person you have not met

The material requirement.

A one-page summary that makes sense with no context: what is proposed, what it costs, what it delivers, the main risk and how it is handled. This is your entire presence in the room. Assume it will be read in three minutes by somebody who was not following the discussion.

5. Address the do-nothing option explicitly

The most likely objection there.

Somebody reviewing a proposal they were not part of developing will ask whether it is necessary now. Setting out the cost of delay gives your advocate an answer.

6. Pre-empt the standard questions

The preparation.

Why this supplier, why this price, why not later, what if it goes wrong. Your contact will face these and will improvise badly unless you have supplied the answers.

7. Make the risk of approving it small

The approver's real concern.

Whoever signs is exposed if it goes badly. Phasing, a trial, references, a break clause and a clear guarantee all reduce that exposure, which matters more to them than the upside.

8. Ask what happened afterwards

The feedback that improves the next one.

"How did the conversation go, and what came up?" tells you what the room actually asked. Over several deals this becomes the most accurate guide to what your material is missing.

9. Keep your contact well disposed

The relationship that carries you.

They are doing you a favour by arguing for you. Making their job easy, and never going around them, is what keeps them willing to do it.

Be careful about assuming your contact has no influence. In many organisations the person who did the research effectively makes the decision and the approver ratifies it, and treating them as a mere conduit is both wrong and noticed.

Conclusion

Find out early that they exist and make sure your case reaches them intact.

Ask who else is involved in the first or second conversation, establish what those people will care about, accept that you will usually not meet them, produce a one-page summary that works with no context, address the option of doing nothing, pre-empt the standard questions, reduce the personal risk for whoever approves it, ask afterwards what came up, and never go around the person representing you.