Follow up after a lost deal, which almost nobody bothers with

4 days ago
3 min read

Updated: 2 days ago

Introduction

When a buyer chooses somebody else, the supplier who lost typically disappears. The record is closed, the contact is removed from consideration, and nothing further happens. That is understandable and it discards three things that were still available: an explanation, a relationship, and a genuine possibility of work later.

The last of these is larger than it sounds. Suppliers get replaced. Projects get repeated. The chosen competitor sometimes performs badly. A buyer who remembers you handling the loss well is the obvious second call, and being that person costs one message.

1. Follow up after a lost deal to find out what happened

The first purpose.

One genuinely curious question, without argument. Buyers answer this more often than expected, particularly when the decision is recent and you are not disputing it. The moment just after a decline is when people are most candid, because they believe the exchange is over.

2. Thank them properly

The second purpose.

For their time and for telling you. This is unusual enough to be remembered, and it is what makes the later contact welcome rather than awkward. Most suppliers say nothing at all, so the bar is low and the effect is disproportionate.

3. Do not argue with the decision

The behaviour that determines everything after.

Contesting it turns a neutral ending into a negative memory. The decision is made; your objective now is the next one. Even a mild attempt to reopen it is remembered as pressure.

4. Say you would be glad to help another time

The opening left behind.

One sentence, sincere, with no conditions attached. This is the entire mechanism by which a lost deal becomes future work. Say it once and leave it, rather than repeating it in a later message.

5. Diarise a contact in six months

The practical step.

Not to ask whether they regret it, but a light useful message. Projects recur, suppliers disappoint, and a message at the right moment finds a changed situation. Record the date at the moment you lose, because it will not be remembered otherwise.

6. Ask how the work went, later

The natural question.

Six months on, asking how the project turned out is a genuine question with no agenda. The answer sometimes opens a conversation and always maintains the relationship. It also tells you something about the competitor you lost to.

7. Record what you learned

The internal value.

Reason given, reason concluded, competitor chosen, price if known. Across twenty losses this is the most useful sales data a small business can hold. Keep it in the same place as your wins so the two can be compared.

8. Handle it the same way whoever they chose

The consistency.

Being gracious only when the winner is respectable is transparent. The behaviour that produces future work is the one applied uniformly. It is also easier to sustain as a habit than as a judgement call.

9. Do not chase after the loss

The limit.

One question, one thank you, one diarised return. A sequence of messages to somebody who has chosen a competitor is the fastest way to remove yourself from consideration permanently.

Be careful about anything that could read as criticism of the chosen supplier. Comments about a competitor, even accurate ones, are both unprofessional and occasionally actionable, and they undo the goodwill the message was intended to create.

Conclusion

Send one gracious message, learn what you can, and diarise a return.

Ask one genuinely curious question without disputing the decision, thank them for their time, say plainly that you would be glad to help another time, put a light contact in the diary for six months, ask later how the project actually went, record both the stated and concluded reasons for the loss, behave the same way regardless of who won, and resist any further pursuit.